I Have a Long List of Symptoms and No One Seems to Put Them Together

Maybe you’ve had this experience.

You make an appointment with your doctor because something just doesn’t feel right.

Actually, a lot of things don’t feel right.

You’re exhausted. You aren’t sleeping well. Your weight is changing. Your stomach is unpredictable. Your periods are different. You’re anxious in a way you never used to be. Your joints hurt. You can’t concentrate. And somewhere along the way, you’ve started wondering whether all of these things are connected.

So you make an appointment.

And then you have fifteen minutes.

There simply isn’t enough time.

You talk about the problem that feels most urgent that day. Maybe you squeeze in a second concern. You get some labs, a medication, or a referral.

Then you come back another day for the next problem.

And another day for the one after that.

Each complaint gets addressed individually, but no one ever gets to hear the whole story.

That is how we end up practicing what I call whack-a-mole medicine.

We treat whichever symptom happens to pop up the highest.

But sometimes the symptom that is making the most noise isn’t actually the problem.

What could we possibly do for two hours?

At Deserving of Joy, I schedule two hours for a new patient visit.

Yes. Two hours.

And one of the things I tell my new patients is:

I want to hear your whole list.

Not just your “most important” problem.

Not the two concerns you think we can squeeze into today's appointment.

Not the sanitized version that you’ve carefully edited because you’re worried about taking up too much of my time.

I want the list.

Because when I hear everything together, something interesting often happens.

You may think you have fifteen different problems.

I may look at those same fifteen symptoms and start wondering whether they are actually clues pointing toward one or two larger problems.

That changes everything.

Instead of putting fifteen Band-Aids on fifteen symptoms, we can start looking for the thing underneath them.

Your symptoms don't exist in separate boxes

Your body doesn't know that one symptom belongs in the “gynecology” box and another belongs in the “mental health” box and another belongs in the “weight” box.

It is one body.

Sleep affects mood. Hormones affect sleep. Medications affect weight. Weight can affect hormones. Anxiety can cause physical symptoms, and physical symptoms can cause anxiety. Nutritional deficiencies, metabolic disease, autoimmune conditions, medications, menopause, sleep disorders and dozens of other things can show up in ways that initially seem unrelated.

Sometimes the symptoms really are separate.

But sometimes they aren't.

And if I never hear the whole list, I may never see the pattern.

I don't have superpowers

I wish I could tell you that I listen to someone's symptoms, stroke my chin thoughtfully, and immediately announce the brilliant diagnosis that everyone else missed.

That isn't how medicine works.

I am not a doctor with superpowers.

I am patient, thorough, empathetic and logical.

Sometimes I know what I think is happening during the appointment.

Sometimes I don't.

And occasionally I will tell a patient exactly that:

“I need to think about this.”

Then I think.

I read.

I research.

I go back through the history. I look for connections. I consider possibilities. I decide whether we need more information.

Good medicine doesn't always mean having an immediate answer.

Sometimes it means caring enough to keep looking for one.

And once we understand what is happening, we make a plan.

Sometimes I can diagnose and treat the problem myself. Sometimes we need another set of eyes, and I refer to a carefully curated group of specialists whose approach to medicine I trust.

Either way, you aren't left alone trying to figure out what to do next.

Bring me the list

If you've been carrying around a long list of symptoms and wondering whether anyone will ever put them together, please don't apologize for it.

Don't shorten it because you think you're being difficult.

Don't decide which symptoms are worthy of mentioning.

Bring me the list.

Give me the story.

Give me the time to think.

Because sometimes what looks like fifteen different problems is actually one story that no one has had enough time to hear.

And I believe we all deserve healthcare that takes the time to listen.

You deserve to be heard. You deserve to be known. And you deserve a plan moving forward.

You are Deserving of Joy.